Forgive My Whining

cartoon of sad woman

Forgive me if this sounds like a Pollyanna perspective, but my disability and the episodes of illness that accompany it, are my truest friend. And, like any friend (human or pet) this relationship is not always smooth and carefree but I can depend on it; we’re committed to one another until death due us part.

You to share an intimate and committed relationship with yourself, even if you don’t often think about it. The mind, body, spirit connection is unique to each of us and yet is also universal. For me, my disability exists in my body and it never lies to me, this is why it is a true friend. If I overextend myself it speaks to me clearly and gets louder (ouch-pain) if I am not listening.

My body gives me niggling sensations in the pit of my tummy, warning me when I may be off track in making a decision, and conversely, it can send butterflies of joy in times of anticipation. Come to think of it these feelings are similar, but that’s when my mind and spirit enter the internal conversation of discernment. As a best friend, my body/disability always wants what is best for me and that’s why it tells me when I have spinach in my teeth (metaphorically).

Maybe your body gives you unwelcome headaches when you work too much, or sore feet when you dance too much. Whatever it presents, it is up to you to determine what’s what and make adjustments. As the saying goes… your body is your temple.

The other day I was feeling sorry for myself, (forgive my whining) it happens from time to time. I felt as though I was being left behind. It was as if I was sitting under a dark cloud when everyone else (whoever they are) was enjoying bright sunny skies. I sat on the woe-is-me-bench for a while; it was comfortable and oh so familiar.

I considered the thoughts that were behind my emotional feelings. My thoughts focused on disappointments that had not come to pass, or come into fruition. Then it occurred to me, why was I missing something, or feeling a loss over something that I had not experienced? It’s one thing to cry over spilled milk, but it this case I had no milk, I just thought I did.

As soon as I became aware of this, my body felt a glow of truth and my heavy mood lifted. I could see myself moving away from my self-imposed benching. What a relief!

My imagined expectations caused imaginary disappointment.

Ha! The mind is a trickster.

My advice… pay attention to your body, it always wants to feel as good as possible, even if limitations must be taken into account.

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